My innards feel bad. Too much soda, methinks.

So, senior speech night, which i kind of dreaded, partly because i didn't have a speech planned, mostly b/c It means that i won't be going back to that room for lessons, but Oh how i'll be going back. I love those people. Yeah, I made a speech, probably went way over time, which I expected to do. Didn't elaborate nearly as much as i wanted to. That starts now.....


Brent, when I say you've made me think, I mean that you've helped me to begin evaluating why i do the things I do, you know, likely, more than anyone that I do things without thinking and you've taught me to really chat with myself about why i do what i do and believe what i believe and think what i think. You've given me room to grow and in some cases shrink, to fly and to stumble, to learn and to have stupidhead. You've allowed me to be who I am and you've slowly helped beat that old masterpeice theme into my head. I'm defanantly on the cheap abstract things step, but hey, those are worth millions right?

Steve-O, I connect to things through music, and I think its so great that you get up there and give it your all even when we don't and you never stop smiling even when we do. I've never been much good at starting conversation, and i assume you've picked up on that, but you made that easier in that there was no intimidation factor and even if i had nothing to say, there would always be a song. You have a gift and Christ shines through in you.

Nathan, you got through my thick head. Maybe its just coincidence that after years of searching and questioning, your voice came through loud and clear, but i find that unlikely. You're being prepared for something amazing, and everybody knows it, even if nobody says it. Perhaps i gave you one of the greatest days of your life, but the story works two fold here. Coincidence or not, you were an enormous part of one of the most important days of my life. You have been a light for me in the confuzzled darkness of my own stubborness. This is a vast accomplishment.

Wes, I don't know what your story is. I don't know how similar or different we really are, but I see strength in you. That Tuesday night, I was feeling pretty down and pretty alone; invisible if you will. I don't know what you knew or didn't know, but you stopped to see what was up with me. Out of the clear blue sky, you gave me that big old hug and told me that you were glad that i came around. You were the first real "big dog" to tell me that and to show me that it was okay that i was around, and that you didn't mind, even liked that i showed up week after week. I cried that day, and i'm not a crier. Its nearly impossible for me, but i felt that loved and I wish i could adequately thank you for what you've done for me. I've always wanted a big brother. You are the very epitome of the brother I always pretended i had. You are very much the big brother i never had.

Jude, I didn't forget you. I couldn't if i tried. You truly are one of those huge reasons i kept coming back. In a sense, you accepted me, no strings attached because you didn't really know me. Thank you for accepting me dispite who i might have been and what i could have become. Thank you for just accepting me. It is a rare and wonderful gift for such people to come into our lives and you are very much that gift.

Mrs. G, you never threw me out of your house and this I cannot believe. I've started debates, asked stupid questions, talked way too much, slaughtered morale, made people cry, and not done homework more times that i can even count, and you still let me in every week. You helped me to understand seemingly infantile concepts and understood that i was still very infantile in my ways. I am defanantly not one of those believers who's ready for solid food, so thanks for mashing it all up for me.

Aundra, for whatever reason, you took interest in my life, and cared about my well being. I don't understand it, and i won't try. Thanks for going all sorts of out of your way to take me to bible study and cause all that trouble.

Rob, thank you for loving my friends unconditionally. Yes, even Randy... I know you picked favorites, but thanks for atleast treating me nice. Thanks for doing all those extra lessons for us and giving us free therapy. Thank you for giving up your sanity for two months to teach us crazy heads a little bit more about a really cool God.


For now, I'm taking a break. I'll finish tomorrow after i wright my research paper. I'm sleepy, but totally not finished with this yet.