So, I'm sitting here in my bedroom in a t shirt and my work pants taking atvantage of the working internet while the luxury lasts and I'm thinking about all sorts of stuff...

- I'm thinking that I smell terrible and i want to take a shower, but i'm just too lazy.

- I'm thinking about how glad I am that it's so cold outside. I miss wintertime weather.

- I'm wondering if this week old pasta roni i heated up is going to make me sick. It seems ok. It tastes fine, but only time will tell.

- I'm wishing that I had something to drink in the house besides Dr. Pepper and Grapefruit juice.

- I'm thinking its time I wrote another song, but I can't seem to muster up the motivation to write anything, since i'm not altoghether unhappy with my life right now.

- I'm looking at these carnations and realizing how feminine I really am.

- I'm thinking about how average I am in most every aspect of my existance, and how beautiful that truly is.

- I'm thinking that my life is extremely routine and patterned, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

- I'm wondering if I'll ever be able to avoid drug related deaths, even at work.

- I'm thinking I should probably go find my checkbook soon.

- I'm thinking that it seems like i've more or less abandoned this journal. I used to depend on this little chunk of the web to tell people all the things I never had the courage to tell them face to face. Looking back, I've been a real hypocrite. I've been too hard on a lot of people I was once so close to. I gave them hell for escaping to pixelated neverlands when I did the very same thing in a different way, and now I admit it virtually. I'd love to say that this entry is the epiphany you've all been waiting for, but we both know that's not true. When I click on that little box and close this all off, I'll be the same, because thats what I do. I change, for a moment maybe, but at the end of the day, I'm still the same lost kid I was when I logged on.

However, I'm not yet willing to let go of this journal, so perhaps I'll make a point to write in it from time to time; make the whole thing worth while. The problem, I think, is I've gotten to a point where I tell myself I reserve this chunk of space for words that actually mean something, and then I can't think of anything to say. Even now, I'm mostly just rambling, stalling so I don't have to leave.

But I'm out of thoughts. And so, until we meet again

Adieu